Bébé Maybe

When I lived in Israel for grad school, traveling out of the country was quite the undertaking. I still vividly remember the stress of one particular trip- a completely last-minute, surprise visit to my boyfriend (now husband of course). It involved- 1. Hauling my heavy luggage up 5 flights of stairs. 2. Taking a 30 minute bus ride to the train station. 3. Taking a 1 hour train ride to the airport. 4. Going through airport security (takes several hours and is pretty intense in Israel). 5. Taking a 2 hour flight to Istanbul. 6. Finding my way around the Istanbul airport during a 1 hour layover. 7. Taking a 3 hour flight to Paris. 8. Taking a 30 minute ride on the metro. 9. Taking a 2 hour train ride to Strasbourg. 10. Taking the Strasbourg tram into the city. 11. Finally, finding my way in the dark and on foot to my hotel. It was much too overwhelming to think about all of these steps at once, so I took it one at a time. "Ok, I'm on the right bus to get to ...

I am annoying myself so much right now! The prospect of doing IVF and everything working out with the clinic we want to be at is so overwhelming that I'm having trouble handling stupid things. I can hold it together, but when any little (and I mean little) thing goes wrong, I can't. Last night I was literally upset because 1. My family watched a movie without me that I would have liked to watch with them, and 2. I look forward to the weekend all week and I was stressed that I was wasting time and not enjoying my weekend enough. This morning I couldn't find anything to wear to church and was stressed about being ready on time. I ended up crying over both of these situations. So obnoxious. David is probably thinking that I am a crazy person. Just imagine what I would be like if I ever get to be pregnant and have those emotions lol. Let's end this with a few things about my life that I don't hate: 1. It's snowing. 2. I have friends at work. 3. There...

Ok, it's not actually 3 letters. It's 20 if you spell it out. IVF! We're doing it. It's simultaneously really horrible and really incredible. One week ago we had a very intense, informative, and overwhelming consultation about starting the process. I'm glad I had the day of the appointment off of work, because that day and the whole weekend afterwards were a wild roller coaster of emotions. The best way I can describe it "a lot." We were given a long checklist of the different steps and how to proceed. A summary: -Another round of testing (blood tests, ultrasound) -A class on how to give yourself shots -4-6 weeks of medication (3 shots a day and more) -Egg retrieval, a surgery for me -Transfer of an embryo (hopefully) It's even more complicated than it seems. Before getting started I need to do even more testing and make sure all of my blood tests are good. If there are no problems there, I need to have an ultrasound to check on some...